My little girl and very best friend, Pepper…

It was one year ago today that I loved her most. One year ago today that I said goodbye.

I know that I will always miss her, but there are a few more smiles than tears now…
on most days.

She was my childhood dog, the dog I grew up with, but most certainly not the dog I had thought I would ever come to call my own. As a little kid, I had wanted every breed imaginable—usually changing it daily, every kind from the tiniest fluffy haired dog to biggest and fiercest dog. I finally narrowed it down to one—a Golden Retriever.

A couple years later we had just moved to rural Virginia (I was eleven) to experience farm life and a dear friend asked if we would like his 18 month old Rat Terrier.

She came with her name included, a worn out collar, a chain leash, food and water bowls, and a light pink house filled with cedar shavings. And she chose me. Not right away of course—she was shy, untrained, a picky eater, and disliked most toys. I taught her manners—how to sit and stay, to not run away, to not bark, to not steal eggs. And Pepper taught me friendship, the true meaning of commitment, and most importantly love and patience.

She came to be my shadow and she always knew what it was I asked of her even without words. She was sweet natured, inquisitive, fearless (in her own small 20 lb. way), and always so full of life.

No, she was not the dog I would have chosen, or even the dog I had wanted, but I know in my heart that she most definitely was the dog I needed. The dog meant for me. And that is all that matters. She truly was a gift and was a very special friend indeed.

Sometimes, the smallest things take up the most room in your heart. ~ Winnie the Pooh

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. ~ Kahil Gibran

This hole in your heart is in the shape of the one you lost—no one else can fit it. ~ Jeanette Winterson

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. ~ Winnie the Pooh

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal. ~ Unknown

Mourning is love with no place to go. ~ Anonymous

And, somewhere out there, there will be another dog meant for me…
one day.

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  1. Pepper sounds like she was a really neat dog. I am sure that one of these days, another dog will fall in the your lap. We just recently found a MinPin for my husband and weren't really looking for another dog.

  2. Rebekah, I know the pain of losing a pet all too well. Our 17 year old cat died about 2 months ago. She was my first baby, and I knew that when the time came, it would be so hard to say goodbye. And it was. The pain has eased, but I have to admit that it was aggravated again with Christmas time. Something/one was missing from our home, and it was her. Thinking of you as you continue to reflect on your grief.

  3. You both received a wonderful gift in your friendship!! I love all your quotes, brought me to tears of sadness and joy all at the same time. I think you'll find another baby to love one day, not to replace Pepper but just another love to fill your heart and Pepper will be happy when you do. Thinking of you both this day, take care my friend!!

  4. I just had to put my lab down this Oct. I miss him terribly. He was 10. He was beautiful. My husband always said Duke should've been a real boy because he was always there to help my husband work on the tractor, haul wood, etc. He was my gardening buddy. So intelligent, always listening to me and I swear he even nodded his head a few times :)